Dr. Karen Winkfield
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Waiting for the Fog to Lift

11/30/2018

2 Comments

 
Looking around, I wonder how folks can just keep moving forward when my life has come to a dead stop. Still reeling from the loss, I try to move about my days as if nothing has changed, but everything has. My fragile mind cannot keep up with the pace I am used to – there is no more hustle in my bustle, no more pep in my step. The air has been let out of my sails.
 
Yesterday, November 29, 2018, marked 6 months since my husband – my best friend – left this earth. 
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The fogginess in my mind was heavier than usual. Awake by 5:30am, getting work done, my second alarm went off at 7am. But I couldn’t recall why I had set it. I checked the clinic schedule and saw that my first patient didn’t arrive until 9:30am so I kept working. Then the text came – “The first set of scores are underway”.  It had completely slipped my mind that I was to be at the lab at 8am. The rest of the day was no better as I dragged myself from one task to the next.
 
Sorrow, fear, longing, regret, guilt – oh the guilt! Emotions swirl. Bolstered by the cheery jingle of the Christmas music that has infiltrated the airwaves.
 
Caregiving is difficult. Grief is devastating.
 
I have been told it gets better with time. Hoping that time comes soon.
​

~Dr. Karen

2 Comments
A. Sheryl Tranquille
11/30/2018 07:00:41 am

You have a Great Crowd of witnesses with you ALWAYS. Thank you for sharing your words and letting us hear you. I hear that the greater the love, the greater the grief. I will continue to pray for you.

Reply
Terri Nida link
11/30/2018 04:30:53 pm

Love you. Praying for you.

Reply



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